Dear Miss Johnsmeyer

We checked the electrolytes in your blood, no big deal. Sodium: normal. Potassium: normal (you eat a lot of bananas?). We checked your kidney function - BUN: normal (whatever that means). Now for the juicy stuff. We performed some tests to count the various cells in your blood. White blood cells: normal. Platelets: normal. Those little hemogoblins??? Normal. Oh yeah and your liver's functioning, we checked that too, just for good measure. You'll probably wanna save this letter to take out and look at whenever you've had a rough day.